≡ Menu

You Can Get Through the Holidays, Even If You’re Single! Dec. 19, 2009

We know the holidays are stressful for everyone.  And I don’t want to discount those of you who are in a relationship, especially if you’re struggling.

But, this month I’d like to focus on singles. Because if you’re single or newly divorced, the holidays can be especially tricky.   It can feel like everyone else has someone to be with or some place to go.  But, if you’re single, it’s easy to feel like you don’t really belong anywhere.  Even if you spend the holidays with friends or family, you can still feel like a 5th wheel.

And that can be hard.

So what can you do about it?

There are all the “wrong” things you can do.  Like getting involved with someone who’s not really right for you.  Or getting too close to someone you’ve just started seeing.  You might feel better in the moment.  But, there’s a good chance you’ll feel worse after.

You can an end up with an “emotional hangover” which is way worse than a physical one.

So what might really help?

  • Sometimes success is just surviving.   I know this sounds very Grinch-like.  But, it’s important to acknowledge that the holidays can be hard at times.  And if you just make it through, without making things worse, that’s a success.
  • Make the most of those holiday get togethers!  This can be a great time to practice smiling and meeting people that you could potentially date.  And if you’re around people who are in good relationships, it’s okay to let them know you’re open to being set-up.

I know — it’s really hard to keep putting yourself out there.

But, instead of just surviving the holidays…maybe this could be an opportunity to meet people who might be right for you!

So, next year the holidays might be even better…

And I hope you’ll join us for “How to Date During the Holidays,” Saturday, December 19, 2009.  Stay tuned!  More information to come!

Vonda (“Vondie”) Lozano, Ph.D., is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Certified Hypnotherapist. She’s been featured in Cosmopolitan, the Wall Street Journal and on KABC Talk Radio. Vondie offers hypnosis, counseling, and workshops in Ventura. Nearby cities include Camarillo, Ojai and Oxnard.

{ 0 comments… add one }

Leave a Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.